In which I surrender

On Monday I received a call from an American friend of mine. She told me that she had hired a part-time maid for me. The woman would be at my house the next morning. She also told me it was too late to say no, and she would pay for it if I wouldn't.

For a moment, I really considered saying no, I didn't need a maid. I was actually feeling a little resentful, because I've been so proud of not giving in to the expat lifestyle (you know, the maid, the nanny, the cook, the driver). Hadn't we been doing fine all along without a maid? However, the truth was and is that right now I could really use some sort of help. With Randy already living in Beijing, I am totally on my own here. Five-week-old babies need to be fed and held a lot, and many household tasks fall by the wayside. True Ambrose confession: We've been eating lunch at Starbucks most days because I can't even get it together to have bread and peanut butter and some sort of fruit or veggie on the side in the house at the same time.

So I accepted the ayi my friend found for me, only for a few hours in the morning a few times a week. It was wonderful that my friend thought of me and my needs even when I am too stubborn to consider them myself.

The maid showed up this morning, and I must admit it was awesome. She folded my laundry, straightend up, dusted, mopped the living room, and wiped down a lot of surfaces. Myles showed her how to use the vacuum cleaner; she couldn't believe that such a machine existed. Tomorrow she tackles bathrooms and the kitchen. All this gets down while I focus on Brigid and Myles. That is, when he isn't following the ayi around to tell her where things go or how I like to do things myself.

Of course, I am justifying to myself that this is only a temporary arrangement until we move to Beijing, and I will have to go back to the unpampered life once we get there. But for now, I think I will just be thankful to have this help when I really need it, to have friends that consider my needs, and to have the extra time to enjoy Myles and Brigid.

Comments

Anonymous said…
I say enjoy it while you can, and there is no shame or anything in it. You deserve it!

When do you move to Beijing?
Nancy said…
Good for you! You do deserve it! The job you are doing with the kids (especially one that is nursing) is way more important than any laundry or dust!!

God Bless You and that maid!!!!
Anonymous said…
under other circumstances, you would have had friends and family come in to help...am I right? So I agree..enjoy the time with the kids while you can and allow yourself to relax....
Anonymous said…
Such strange puritanism, or prissy, left-wing dogma? Don't you know you are giving a job to a poor person? They are very happy to work for you. Try and put aside your self-righteousness! If you are interested in asceticism live in sack cloth, cave, kill or grow your own food, etc.
Jen Ambrose said…
So, for the history of why we haven't had an ayi or cleaner before, this is a helpful place to start with this as a more recent follow up. Because both of our Chinese lessons are suspended (Myles' teacher had to go home and I just can't schedule mine in yet), we now have the money to pay for a cleaner. So, no, I'm not prissy or puritainical, unless that means I don't want us to get lazy like other foreigners I've met whose kids are not responsible for picking up after themselves or making their own beds. IT'S BECAUSE UNTIL RECENTLY WE COULDN'T AFFORD ALL THREE (STARBUCKS AND A CLEANER AND CHINESE LESSONS) AND GOING TO STARBUCKS SEVERAL TIMES A WEEK MAKES ME HAPPY. A cleaner only makes life a little easier. Chinese lessons are just too important to us.

And as for giving a poor person a job....that is hysterical. I think I need to go to the foreign women's club weekly coffee gabfest and see how many of them have one or more domestic helpers and nannies because they like the idea of giving poor people jobs. Puhlease.
Anonymous said…
anonymous posters only post to provoke. Personally I don't think you should ever have to explain one's actions to ANYONE...using phrases like "giving a poor person a job" and "they are happy to work for you" sounds most smug and condescending on your part,mystery blogger!
If you're serious in commenting on one's ascestisim or lack thereof, or making snide comments from your snarled perception of her lifestyle, step up and post your name... begin a real dialogue... If you were interested in an honest discussion, you wouldn't have posted anonymously!! just an example of your cowardice.
Deirdre Mundy said…
What an AWESOME gift! I think every new mom could use a maid's help. After all, when you have kids, ONE day off from serious chores can lead to chaos...

You'll be able to enjoythe first weeks with your baby a lot more if you're not stressing about the fact that she times her growth spurts for the very times you NEED to be cleaning! =)