Post-script
For those of you that followed the story back in June about the early part of my pregnancy, from trying unsuccessfully to find a local hospital where I would be comfortable receiving care to securing a booking at a Hong Kong hospital for delivery (parts 1, 2, 3, 4), I wanted to follow up with some reflections on our experiences.
First of all, I really do need to say that overall, we were very pleased with my physician, the hospital, and most everything else. Like we would have had anywhere else in the world, there were a few glitches (including Randy and Myles not knowing for three hours that Brigid was born--that much more than a glitch), but mostly we were very happy with the hospital.
My OB was wonderful. We were very fortunate that we were able to be referred to her. Most importantly, she caught a strep infection I was carrying that was potentially very dangerous to the baby if left untreated. We were pretty sure that this would not have been caught had we remained on the Mainland for care. That alone was worth the total cost of everything to us. I was also very nervous about Hong Kong doctors, with their reputation for going much more quickly to the surgical option for delivery than perhaps doctors in Western countries. Part of this, I am sure, is to try to keep all the surgeries inside of "regular business hours." For a patient, most HK hospitals charge a surcharge for an unplanned C-section, and an even greater surcharge (like 50%) for an unplanned, after-hours C-section. However, my doctor totally respected my wishes in every area of delivery, including "pain management" and delivery procedures. And for the True Ambrose Confession: If I ever get uppity about not having an epidural, please feel free to remind me it was NOT because I am superwoman, but because all I could think in between contractions was, "Twelve thousand Hong Kong dollars. I don't have HK$12,000."
The hospital is not the first choice of most of the Westerners who try to book a private Hong Kong maternity package. Usually, Westerners get into the main Adventist hospital, which is much more like a Western hospital, with all private or semi-private rooms, optional full-time rooming-in, even jacuzzi bathtubs for labor. The Adventist hospital into which I was able to be booked was much more Chinese. I was the only white foreigner there at the time. Many, many of the other mothers were Mainland Chinese. At first I was surprised to hear so much Mandarin spoken in the hallways, but then it made sense to me. This hospital was very convenient to the Mainland. Most of the nurses were bilingual (Cantonese and Mandarin). As soon as it got around that I could speak Mandarin (they left out the "some", as in I could speak some Mandarin), many stopped trying to speak English to me. Seven months ago I was afraid to be in a Chinese hospital where no one would understand English, and here I was, in Hong Kong, discussing baby care in Mandarin. My discharge instructions were even given to me in Mandarin, though that was easy to follow (cord care, diaper cream, etc). The pediatrician, a UK-educated Hong Konger, asked me to stop speaking Chinese. He said I was making some of the staff look bad. I can imagine the nurses giving him heck for this white foreigner speaking Mandarin and he, a Chinese physician, only able to speak English and Cantonese. The nurses sometimes had to translate for him with the other Mainland Chinese patients that weren't able to speak Cantonese.
This hospital has a pretty strict "no babies outside of the nursery" policy. The main Adventist hospital does not, and even facilitates rooming-in. Perhaps if the private rooms were not on a separate floor from the nursery, it would have been usual in the hospital where we were. The nurses told me that they could not allow the babies to go in the elevator with all those people and their germs. I was clearly upset, and, fortunately, the nurses were able to make arrangements so that I had a rarely-used room, one usually occupied only if there were overflow in the Labor & Delivery Department. It was on the same floor as the nursery, so the baby could go in the morning for weigh-in and bathing and examination by the pediatrician and then be returned to me.
The concept of rooming-in was clearly foreign to some of the nurses. Most did not have a problem with coming to my room to check Brigid's temperature every few hours, wheeling her to the nursery for the daily weigh-in and physician check. A few, though, were surprised to find me awake at all hours of the day and night, trying to feed her, and one was absolutely shocked that I was changing her diapers on my own. She had come in to check Brigid's temperature, and found her in a dry, clean diaper. She was positively alarmed, thinking there were something wrong, until I showed her where I had charted her diaper contents, as I was requested to as a condition of the rooming-in arrangement.
The usual arrangement was for the mothers to come to the "nursing room" to feed their babies. I walked through the nursing room on my way to the nursery to meet with Brigid's doctor, and I have no idea how I would have handled having to use this room. The room was lined with about twenty chairs, and at that time each was occupied by a woman trying to nurse or bottle-feed her baby. In addition there were three or four other women standing in the middle of the room waiting for an empty seat. Even with that many women there, the nursery was still full of babies. I really cannot see how "feed on demand" could be accomplished in this manner, unless I slept in the nursing room. Further, noting some of the Mainlanders staring at me when I walked through, I really, really, really would not have wanted an audience in those early days of nursing.
I must point out that we were not seeking special treatment, merely what we thought we would be getting at this hospital. Of course, that was based on the main Adventist Hospital's brochure. The branch where we were did not indicate either way about rooming-in in the brochure. We know better now, but we were very fortunate that they were able to accommodate us. I am pretty sure that when my doctor assured us that we would get the sort of services we Westerners were used to when she found us a space at a hospital, she did not imagine we would necessarily be at this branch of Adventist. And I don't want to say that how we did this is superior to the normal arrangements, but culturally, we were not equipped to handle the way things were normally done at this hospital.
Let me put it this way---Most of the new Chinese mothers I saw would, upon discharge from the hospital, return home and be looked after full-time by their mother or mother-in-law. They would get to remain in bed, and someone would bring the baby to them to feed if they are nursing, or just let her sleep through the bottle feedings if she isn't. She'd have someone else fix her special meals and do her laundry and cleaning. If she is from Hong Kong and can afford it, she may even hire a special confinement nanny who will take care of her and the baby for the first month. We, on the other hand, live a more "traditional" American life. Upon discharge from the hospital, we look at each other and ask, "Who let us out into the world with this delicate little three-day-old baby?" We return home (or in our case check into a hotel), and we are responsible for the baby. Our preferred method, using rooming-in, gets us geared up for the many sleepless weeks ahead.
First of all, I really do need to say that overall, we were very pleased with my physician, the hospital, and most everything else. Like we would have had anywhere else in the world, there were a few glitches (including Randy and Myles not knowing for three hours that Brigid was born--that much more than a glitch), but mostly we were very happy with the hospital.
My OB was wonderful. We were very fortunate that we were able to be referred to her. Most importantly, she caught a strep infection I was carrying that was potentially very dangerous to the baby if left untreated. We were pretty sure that this would not have been caught had we remained on the Mainland for care. That alone was worth the total cost of everything to us. I was also very nervous about Hong Kong doctors, with their reputation for going much more quickly to the surgical option for delivery than perhaps doctors in Western countries. Part of this, I am sure, is to try to keep all the surgeries inside of "regular business hours." For a patient, most HK hospitals charge a surcharge for an unplanned C-section, and an even greater surcharge (like 50%) for an unplanned, after-hours C-section. However, my doctor totally respected my wishes in every area of delivery, including "pain management" and delivery procedures. And for the True Ambrose Confession: If I ever get uppity about not having an epidural, please feel free to remind me it was NOT because I am superwoman, but because all I could think in between contractions was, "Twelve thousand Hong Kong dollars. I don't have HK$12,000."
The hospital is not the first choice of most of the Westerners who try to book a private Hong Kong maternity package. Usually, Westerners get into the main Adventist hospital, which is much more like a Western hospital, with all private or semi-private rooms, optional full-time rooming-in, even jacuzzi bathtubs for labor. The Adventist hospital into which I was able to be booked was much more Chinese. I was the only white foreigner there at the time. Many, many of the other mothers were Mainland Chinese. At first I was surprised to hear so much Mandarin spoken in the hallways, but then it made sense to me. This hospital was very convenient to the Mainland. Most of the nurses were bilingual (Cantonese and Mandarin). As soon as it got around that I could speak Mandarin (they left out the "some", as in I could speak some Mandarin), many stopped trying to speak English to me. Seven months ago I was afraid to be in a Chinese hospital where no one would understand English, and here I was, in Hong Kong, discussing baby care in Mandarin. My discharge instructions were even given to me in Mandarin, though that was easy to follow (cord care, diaper cream, etc). The pediatrician, a UK-educated Hong Konger, asked me to stop speaking Chinese. He said I was making some of the staff look bad. I can imagine the nurses giving him heck for this white foreigner speaking Mandarin and he, a Chinese physician, only able to speak English and Cantonese. The nurses sometimes had to translate for him with the other Mainland Chinese patients that weren't able to speak Cantonese.
This hospital has a pretty strict "no babies outside of the nursery" policy. The main Adventist hospital does not, and even facilitates rooming-in. Perhaps if the private rooms were not on a separate floor from the nursery, it would have been usual in the hospital where we were. The nurses told me that they could not allow the babies to go in the elevator with all those people and their germs. I was clearly upset, and, fortunately, the nurses were able to make arrangements so that I had a rarely-used room, one usually occupied only if there were overflow in the Labor & Delivery Department. It was on the same floor as the nursery, so the baby could go in the morning for weigh-in and bathing and examination by the pediatrician and then be returned to me.
The concept of rooming-in was clearly foreign to some of the nurses. Most did not have a problem with coming to my room to check Brigid's temperature every few hours, wheeling her to the nursery for the daily weigh-in and physician check. A few, though, were surprised to find me awake at all hours of the day and night, trying to feed her, and one was absolutely shocked that I was changing her diapers on my own. She had come in to check Brigid's temperature, and found her in a dry, clean diaper. She was positively alarmed, thinking there were something wrong, until I showed her where I had charted her diaper contents, as I was requested to as a condition of the rooming-in arrangement.
The usual arrangement was for the mothers to come to the "nursing room" to feed their babies. I walked through the nursing room on my way to the nursery to meet with Brigid's doctor, and I have no idea how I would have handled having to use this room. The room was lined with about twenty chairs, and at that time each was occupied by a woman trying to nurse or bottle-feed her baby. In addition there were three or four other women standing in the middle of the room waiting for an empty seat. Even with that many women there, the nursery was still full of babies. I really cannot see how "feed on demand" could be accomplished in this manner, unless I slept in the nursing room. Further, noting some of the Mainlanders staring at me when I walked through, I really, really, really would not have wanted an audience in those early days of nursing.
I must point out that we were not seeking special treatment, merely what we thought we would be getting at this hospital. Of course, that was based on the main Adventist Hospital's brochure. The branch where we were did not indicate either way about rooming-in in the brochure. We know better now, but we were very fortunate that they were able to accommodate us. I am pretty sure that when my doctor assured us that we would get the sort of services we Westerners were used to when she found us a space at a hospital, she did not imagine we would necessarily be at this branch of Adventist. And I don't want to say that how we did this is superior to the normal arrangements, but culturally, we were not equipped to handle the way things were normally done at this hospital.
Let me put it this way---Most of the new Chinese mothers I saw would, upon discharge from the hospital, return home and be looked after full-time by their mother or mother-in-law. They would get to remain in bed, and someone would bring the baby to them to feed if they are nursing, or just let her sleep through the bottle feedings if she isn't. She'd have someone else fix her special meals and do her laundry and cleaning. If she is from Hong Kong and can afford it, she may even hire a special confinement nanny who will take care of her and the baby for the first month. We, on the other hand, live a more "traditional" American life. Upon discharge from the hospital, we look at each other and ask, "Who let us out into the world with this delicate little three-day-old baby?" We return home (or in our case check into a hotel), and we are responsible for the baby. Our preferred method, using rooming-in, gets us geared up for the many sleepless weeks ahead.
Comments
I really admire-and envy- you for learning Mandarin.
Susan Peterson