I'm the punchline. What's the joke?
Twice--not once, but twice--in the past week I have sent a Chinese person into hysterics. The first was when we were at the playground. The ayi of two brothers we knew there said to me that she had never seen Myles out with his ayi. I told her that was because we didn't have one. She then said through her hysterical laughter, "Wow! You take care of your own child. HAHAHAHA" etc.
The second time was after my dentist's appointment last week. I noticed as we were finished that it was after noon, and I said that it was lunchtime. The hygienist asked me if I had a cook. Again, the answer was no, I cook. Again, the laughter.
It's one thing when my sisters or my own mother laugh at my attempts at mother/wife business. It is entirely another when complete strangers are amused by it. I mean, do I exude incompetence?
Randy has a theory. Just as Rachel of Foreign Babes in Beijing shocked (and according to her really shocked) her Chinese coworkers because she wasn't fat, perhaps to a lot of Chinese people who interact with the foreigners in Shekou it is shocking that anyone is not interested in or may be not able to afford domestic help. Randy thinks that perhaps the paradigm is that foreign women need the help, because they don't know what they doing. Not that that is true, but that might be the belief. And of course, I don't let not knowing what to do get in my way.
I have another theory, too. I wonder if through the propoganda of one-child policies, the prevailing belief is that taking care of even one child and a home is really, really difficult. So often I hear from Chinese women in their early to mid 20s that they aren't ready and even are afraid to have a family because it is so much work. I mean, we all know that it is, but not so much work that most of us wouldn't do it at all.
Oh yeah, Randy has another theory that he likes to throw around to guilt me. He says that by not having full-time help, I've taken a job away from some poor Chinese woman who needs it to support her own family. I then counter that with all my trips to Starbucks, I am supporting many more Chinese jobs. And I do have the maid that comes in for 30-40 minutes every morning, which in my opinion is a bit excessive, so I do support 1/16 of her income.
The second time was after my dentist's appointment last week. I noticed as we were finished that it was after noon, and I said that it was lunchtime. The hygienist asked me if I had a cook. Again, the answer was no, I cook. Again, the laughter.
It's one thing when my sisters or my own mother laugh at my attempts at mother/wife business. It is entirely another when complete strangers are amused by it. I mean, do I exude incompetence?
Randy has a theory. Just as Rachel of Foreign Babes in Beijing shocked (and according to her really shocked) her Chinese coworkers because she wasn't fat, perhaps to a lot of Chinese people who interact with the foreigners in Shekou it is shocking that anyone is not interested in or may be not able to afford domestic help. Randy thinks that perhaps the paradigm is that foreign women need the help, because they don't know what they doing. Not that that is true, but that might be the belief. And of course, I don't let not knowing what to do get in my way.
I have another theory, too. I wonder if through the propoganda of one-child policies, the prevailing belief is that taking care of even one child and a home is really, really difficult. So often I hear from Chinese women in their early to mid 20s that they aren't ready and even are afraid to have a family because it is so much work. I mean, we all know that it is, but not so much work that most of us wouldn't do it at all.
Oh yeah, Randy has another theory that he likes to throw around to guilt me. He says that by not having full-time help, I've taken a job away from some poor Chinese woman who needs it to support her own family. I then counter that with all my trips to Starbucks, I am supporting many more Chinese jobs. And I do have the maid that comes in for 30-40 minutes every morning, which in my opinion is a bit excessive, so I do support 1/16 of her income.
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